Darling you got to let me know. Should I stay or should I go?*

It’s a good question.

When is the right time to call it quits?

Do you feel that you have tried everything to make it work? Have you and your partner explored all possibilities when it comes to working on the relationship?

As much as you both may try, the deep soul-searching, weekends away and date nights may be a flop. There might be nothing left in the relationship tank; perhaps it has holes that just can’t be mended, and no matter how much you keep refilling it, it continues to leak.

The pit in your stomach when you think about separating—the impact on your kids, friends, extended family and your partner, and your financial position—is understandable. Separation is scary.

You can choose to explore separating or staying together in several different ways before actually making the decision:

I’m personally a big fan of Gary Chapman’s 5 Languages of Love quiz. It’s quite insightful when working out how you feel loved by your partner. (You can also do it for your child!).  The quiz, which is free to take, identifies how you prioritise feeling loved—whether it is words of affirmation (compliments), acts of service, gifts, quality time and/or physical touch. Imagine then being able to communicate that to your partner.

You can also do the quiz as a single person or in a relationship.

*The Clash’s infamous lyrics to their song ‘Should I Stay or Should I go?’

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.